A Pup-date

As I sit down to compose this latest post, I am still wearing yesterday's clothes - pink velveteen pants that have been nibbled here and there and a sweater that has been intermittently pulled apart by tiny sharp puppy claws. I have a small bite mark on my pinky finger, (the Dashing Litigator has a tiny scratch near his left eye), I am sleep deprived and oh so deliriously happy.

Duncan has arrived.

All week we had been anticipating this big day. Friday at work we sent each other "T minus" emails counting down the hours, minutes and seconds until Duncan was 'home'.

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It is early on Saturday, and I bake a loaf of banana nut bread, writing "Duncan" across it in black icing, and trimming it with chocolate frosting. Later, when I get the call from the Dashing Litigator that he is home - and hear the proof positive puppy yelps in the background - I quickly grab my things and head out the door.

The Dashing Litigator is in the house on the phone and his best friend is sitting out on the porch with Duncan on his leash when I arrive. It is he who introduces me to the pup. This pup that is barely a foot long, made of chocolately velvet and with the palest grey/blue eyes I've ever seen. Much like my first encounter with his owner, it is love at first sight.

In a matter of moments I have dumped my bag and the loaf of bread in the house and have an 8 week old puppy climbing into my lap. Not a bad way to spend a rainy Saturday afternoon. The best friend leaves and soon the Dashing Litigator and I are left to care for this very adorable puppy by ourselves. This puppy that is sleeping and snoring softly against my cheek. The Dashing Litigator finds the disposable camera that I've brought and begins putting it to use, capturing each adorable moment.

What follows is an entire 24 hours of such moments. Some captured on film, but most held in my mind and in my heart:

- The Dashing Litigator teaching his dog to follow him throughout the house- watching his large frame being trailed by the awkward ambling of a puppy who has not yet grown into his oversized paws.

- Observing the magical power of the words "Go Pee!" and the shared joyous excitement over a puppy-sized bowel movement.

- The hesitation to leave the crying puppy alone for two hours in his crate while we (selfishly?) went to Greek town for dinner.

- Being on our first real date in over a week - and feeling our connection with each other grow even deeper as we reveal things that we love about each other.

- Arriving home to find Duncan awake and dry and very happy to see us.

- Cuddling on the couch flanked by two very tired boys who have had a very big day. Duncan dozing with his head on my right shoulder, and the Dashing Litigator dozing with his head on my left. While I smile in the middle, silently knowing that this is heaven to me.

- Waking up at 2:30am to puppy yelps and all three of us taking that opportunity to 'Go Pee'.

- Waking up at 4am to more puppy yelps and the pungent smack-you-in-the-face smell of puppy pee pee and puppy poo poo.

- The Dashing Litigator cleaning up a messy Duncan in the kitchen sink, while I clean out his cage. Both fully embracing these duties with more laughter and I-can't-believe-we're-doing-this than annoyance.

- Waking up to find the Dashing Litigator asleep with a pillow on his kitchen floor beside his sleeping and caged puppy, who had finally stopped crying.

- The undeniable maternal and paternal instincts that have kicked in for both of us with the arrival of this precious Duncan.

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The Dashing Litigator is terrified. He has never had a pet before, let alone an 8 week old puppy. He is flying without a net, asking me questions at every turn, trusting my judgment. When he drops me off to head back home to his Duncan, I can see doubt all over his face. I turn to him, "You are doing all the right things. You just need to commit to this and be confident. Be as confident as you are when you walk into the courtroom. You can do this. Trust yourself. You're going to be ok."

He smiles and thanks me, kisses me, then drives home. And it occurs to me that the doubt and lack of confidence the Dashing Litigator is feeling about Duncan is the same that I had been feeling with regards to this relationship. I have never been in a relationship that latest longer than 2 months, and here we are in week 11. I have no idea what I'm doing. I'm terrified as well.

And it occurs to me that this puppy is barely 8 weeks old. We have been dating longer than Duncan has been alive. Already he is becoming aware of the Dashing Litigator as someone important to him, following him around, obeying him dutifully. And as was made evident by the number of times he crawled into my lap and fell asleep - he's realizing I am important, too.

This 8 week old puppy is too young to have ever known us apart. He only knows us together. And it is my prayer that he'll know us this way for a long, long time.